Monthly Archives: August 2020

.day 76.

hurrah some of yesterday’s plan worked
hiding quiet that is and all went well right

the bike just sat quietly
will be dealt with another
day as i have no equipment
after all
and will rely on ebay

i understand the grants come in june
so it can all wait till then

is nice just to see it there
to see what comes

i drew the trees
the blur when walking
drifting in thought and revery

i sat on the warm grass
cursed the hedge while
starting a logistical plan

to lower it

to lower the level

of stress and interference

indoors for weeks and they still come in and get you

i like not having my hair cut
looks a mess yet at least is
not cut as the stylist demands


i saw her down the graveyard yesterday
tidying her parent’s spot. i was at my window

these things




a week ago i made my neighbour a tiny ladder
repayment for a kindness
left it by his door on the step

this morning it remains
where i placed it

perhaps he has not seen
it yet

or other things

thanks for your remote offer of help and support

the bike is free from storage & on the courtyard
washed and fiddled with
the pump is nowhere to be found
while the other one don’t fit

so except for a permitted trip to durham to buy one
i am buggered

the brakes is stuck
i need some oil

it will all wait a while

sat on it and maybe i shrunked

is been stored for 23 years
the other
the blue one i had since 17


so they look ferocious little fellers
guess we are all just trying to survive

i listened to a podcast and even that
virus thing needs the same and would
have learned more if i had not fell to


i just fell to sleep
from all the tasks
& emotions of

another day
staying at home

on my own

walking i have found a house
that stands alone with a proper
garden with chickens you know
rather wild and rambling

i like the position yet know i belong
here, love it here. will hide away today

no drive anywhere to test my eyesight

steady like



oh james i have done that thing again
wishing for something i may already have

my old bike is in the outbuilding left there
some time
i have a bicycle repair kit


i like to collect them

i understand there may be some grant soon
for fixing

i know how to oil as my brothers showed me
fastidiously and bossy

and something with spoons to remove the tyres

to balance it upside down on the handlebars

and saddle

what is to lose and it may be fun as the other

jobs have been here

oh dear you should of heard me yesterday
when he remarked
in surprise

you can dig a pond!
you can saw wood!

i replied i can as i am a person too

i did not add that in his mind i may not do them well
in my mind it works
for me

i gave him a bucket of stones

yesterday i made the hedgehog house with pallette
wood and twigs of course

the twigs that is

it kind of sorted itself out
now in comfort i will unpick
it to form it in a more controlled manner

my brother suggests i take the bike to durham
to be fixed as that may now be permissable

i think it is more fun just to stay at home james




another good number pleases me
as do the images

you are a dark horse
rather like louis

maybe you will do some more

i like this type of work from the heart
a quiet day yesterday planting and
fiddling the wildlife pool
sitting after to reflect

the head came later
while i could not
bear to watch the

it is all so unfair

slept for one hundred years
with classic lockdown dreams

now refreshed
carry on

we carry on
keeping the rules here


day started heavy as those adults used to say back then

i never understood

we had a storm, wind and some rain, now all hangs dark

and quiet

today i will repot the blown plants and tidy

do you write music? i like that you sent very


and will research more

the ride sounds divine, all that power

freedom and names of roads that come


here we made another ladder and now

i have too many

drew some pictures

and continued making the wildlife pond

i think i had been brainwashed into thinking

that some tasks were impossible yet find

i can do them after all

maybe i washed my brain myself

and now have got it back james

i ask again james are you a musician

do you sing while you ride the roads

over there

some of us obey the rules while it seems

that those who helped make them do not

birds and willow at the window


ate the last banana
not feeling good as
i did so

crossed them from the shopping list
and went to bed early

all well today and with another stormy
day forecast may leave the digging for
settled weather

the patch is under the big old oak which
flaps wildly in this wind

i became slightly nervous looking up
at it
retreated to the studio

it will be a wildlife place
for the wildlife here

she used messenger to tell me
her messenger was not working

we sorted it by phone james

while writing i stop to look at
the light on the leaves, the light


i went outside to the garage
for fuel
in case of emergency
i like at least 2 bars

wore my surgical gloves with pride
i don’t get out much these days

vivaldi helps

late spring
early summer



looking at the old bananas here yesterday
decided to make cake
rather than waste them

looks for a recipe
oh yes that will
do with oil

so bung the mashed bananas in the bowl
three with equal eggs
to find i have no oil

another recipe with margarine
when i only have spread…..ok

oh no, it states only
2 bananas
2 eggs

too late

this one is in metric
my scales are in imperial

another recipe
by then is all in the bowl

when i reads to cream the marg and sugar
too late i just bash the lot together and throw
in sultanas for luck

with the big silver spoon

lucky me

my oven is hot electric fan
the book goes gas, so guessing

works and that thing with a knitting needle

all came good, my first cake to eat for ten weeks
buns don’t count in this house

first cake made for years
to adhere to lockdown urban rules

ate with cream of course
then carried on with ladders

there was a storm in the night
water seeped through the bathroom
roof light
soaked the tissue

it is drying out on the radiator


no planes yesterday


.sixty nine days.

seems soon to me
i have been isolated
ten weeks now and
waiting for news

from our first minister
not the prime minister

for we are another country

especially in this house
where all come quiet the
piano playing

where we come kind & welcoming

i wonder if i will go back
or draw a line on the madness

i talk to him regular about it and
he will like me to stay of course

who else will look after him not
throw him away

who else will mend his dress or
wash his pyjamas james

it was a joke
now comes serious

she said i can borrow her bike
she is taller than me james

so i fixed the water butt and down pipe
cussing the one that came before and
left it scrappy

got hot talked it through with logic

a professional would rubbish the work
which seems to work

so far james

so far we have come
tomorrow i have a small celebration here alone

i wrote it down and refered to it later in the day

eggs over easy?

light rain